Monday, July 6, 2009

Overcoming Blog-guilt

I think a lot more people would start blogs if they didn't dread the prospect of feeling guilty for when they don't update. I, currently, while not feeling guilty, per se, am feeling like a very bad blogger. Which in turn makes me delay updating my blog. Which in turn makes me feel bad. It kind of reminds me of checking in on that person you have not talked to in ages, but were supposed to. Or unclogging the bathroom drain. Tasks you delay become more painful. Not that this is a task.

How do you sum up the past few months? I was best man for my buddy, started a new job, went to North Africa, saw people come into my life and leave, some of them significantly. Looking back on my old blog postings, it's fascinating to see how I (and we all) evolve as a person. How the things we think about, the things that bother us and worry us, the view from here all change.

I will resist the urge to quote Heraclitus here.

My old blog posts look like the rings of an old tree, or the layers of sedimentation, where I can read the past from the eye of the past me, not from the renewed lens of the present. I sometimes wonder how my future eyes will read this present.

After arriving home from North Africa, I am more excited for what life holds. I love the sensation of catching a whiff of a scent you have not smelled in a while, the pungent odour of adventure. It is a pleasure, more than any other, to know, more than I did yesterday, the God who has created me to know and follow Him.

2 comments:

Tessa Snider said...

I love your idea of your past blog posts being like the rings of a tree! What a beautiful image.

Now I'm imagining all the years of my life growing around each other, my experiences expanding on the ones that went before, my soul widening and reaching upwards...

James said...

Yes, Nice analogy Steve.

I've often felt the same looking back over my old blog posts. I have them going back to 2003 on blogger and even earlier updates on my website. See: http://www.jambe.co.nz/ramble2001.html

It makes me think of writers like St Augustine, people seem to be able to quote him saying completely opposite things, I suspect the reason is that while he was developing his ideas and theology, he was still writing. We are really getting a rare insight into the way someone's thoughts developed. Random thought there anyway...

Oh, and thanks for giving me blog guilt again :)

James