Sick

I'm sick... not badly, but for long enough to lower my morale. I love reading this poem when I'm sick, although when you have the flu, it's a tad dramatic. This gem was written by John Donne eight days before his death...

Hymn to God, My God, in my Sickness
by John Donne

Since I am coming to that holy room,
Where, with thy choir of saints for evermore,
I shall be made thy music; as I come
I tune the instrument here at the door,
And what I must do then, think here before.

Whilst my physicians by their love are grown
Cosmographers, and I their map, who lie
Flat on this bed, that by them may be shown
That this is my south-west discovery,
Per fretum febris, by these straits to die,

I joy, that in these straits I see my west;
For, though their currents yield return to none,
What shall my west hurt me? As west and east
In all flat maps (and I am one) are one,
So death doth touch the resurrection.

Is the Pacific Sea my home? Or are
The eastern riches? Is Jerusalem?
Anyan, and Magellan, and Gibraltar,
All straits, and none but straits, are ways to them,
Whether where Japhet dwelt, or Cham, or Shem.

We think that Paradise and Calvary,
Christ's cross, and Adam's tree, stood in one place;
Look, Lord, and find both Adams met in me;
As the first Adam's sweat surrounds my face,
May the last Adam's blood my soul embrace.

So, in his purple wrapp'd, receive me, Lord;
By these his thorns, give me his other crown;
And as to others' souls I preach'd thy word,
Be this my text, my sermon to mine own:
"Therefore that he may raise, the Lord throws down."

The Concert of a Lifetime -- Part 3

"Uno! Dos! Tres! Catorce!" (One, Two, Three, Fourteen!)

So screamed Bono with a rollick, in terrible Spanish, and "Vertigo" began. "Vertigo" isn't my favourite U2 song in particular, but I hate to admit that I was taken with Bono's swaggering intro. Next on the setlist was "I'll Go Crazy If I Don't Go Crazy Tonight", another song I'm not yet fully enamoured with, but it was still enjoyable.

Really, I was hoping for as many oldie-goldies as possible, and the next song didn't disappoint. With a somewhat unclear introductory video referencing the Iranian elections, Larry's militant drumbeats and Edge's insistent repetitions of one of the most iconic guitar riffs in rock history ushered in the oldest song of the night: "Sunday, Bloody Sunday" from 1983's War album. You just can't go wrong with it. Edge's guitar instrumental in the middle was slashing and jarring, just as it should be.

Afterwards, U2 was generous enough to include a rare treat, which I quite enjoyed: "MLK" from 1984's "Unforgettable Fire" album. An underspoken, hymn-like tribute to the great Dr. King. It was so stirring, I was wrapped up in the moment of appreciating the song. I was grateful, too, that they included the following song on their setlist. Devoting it (and the rest of the concert) to Burmese civil rights leader Aung Sun Suu Kyi, they played song which pleases my sentimental side: "Walk On". It was everything that I hoped for it to be. U2 then left the stage, and some suckers in the crowd, thought that the concert was over, and left. In disbelief, I repeatedly pointed out that they still hadn't played "Streets".

Of course, they came back. They played "One", their painfully beautiful song about love and isolation in a fallen world. I pulled out the lighters I had brought for this song and distributed them accordingly. Next, they lead the oblivious crowd in a stirring rendition of "Amazing Grace". It was wonderful to sing the song along with the band. And then... the stained-glass strains of Edge's guitar filled the Roger's Centre with the chiming notes of what is arguably their greatest masterpiece: "Where the Streets Have No Name". It was simply perfect; there is no more that they can say. The three songs together held a sort of redemptive trajectory: from the ironic (in the Fryean sense) separation of fallen love in the first, to the comedic path of redemption in the second, to the enjoyment of the Romantic world of Heaven in the third.

U2 then went back under the stage, and more suckers left the building.

Their second encore was tremendous. Bono was wearing -- I kid you not -- a jacket with lasers coming out of it, and was holding onto and swinging from what I can only describe as a flourescent steering wheel of a microphone suspended from above. The opening chords of their next song took me aback, initially, because I didn't at first know what they were, but I quickly realized that they were playing "Ultraviolet" from "Achtung Baby". I really loved it, a fantastic song. To hear Bono wail "Baby, baby, baby, light my way" as lasers shot out of his chest was truly magical.

Next was, I have to say, was the song I had been waiting for. As soon as I heard Adam's insistent bass line and the unearthly and pure sustain of Edge's guitar on "With or Without You" I felt deeply affected. Words fail for how magical this song was. Bono's vocal performance was perfect as the disco ball illuminated a crowd of tens of thousands, while one felt a strange intimacy with the band, even in the nosebleed section. This was the most magical song of the night. I wish I was still listening there listening to that song.

The final song of the night is the second best song on the new album: "Moment of Surrender" -- another Augustinian spiritual song. As Bono sang such naked lyrics as "My body is a begging bowl, and I'm begging to get back to the rhythm of my soul, to the rhythm of my unconsciousness", my friend pointed out that the lights of the CN tower were pulsing in many colours along with the music. It was gorgeous. The band left, and I was silent. I could barely say anything for the rest of the night.

My analysis several days (weeks?) after the concert? It was surprising to see not a single song from "Pop" on the setlist, although I have read they have not played an entire song from the album on their whole tour. I was especially glad that they played "Until the End of the World" at this concert. I would have been happy if they had played "Gloria" or "40" or "New Year's Day", but I could not complain with the fantastic song line-up.

All in all, the concert renewed my love for U2 and was an entirely unforgettable night.

The Concert of a Lifetime -- Part 2

As day gave way to dusk, and dusk in turn yielded to darkness under the shadow of the CN tower, my pulse increased as it struck me that I really was about to see U2. And then, I saw the cars roll in.



They were in the stadium.



As I looked onto the green monster of a stage, the speakers blared "Space Oddity" by Dave Bowie, and one by one, the members took the stage. Larry went to the kit and immediately started pounding the skins. Ash-haired Adam took his lanky stance with the bass. The Edge slung his guitar over his shoulder. And then a rather short man in a leather jacket came out. But enough of that... on to the concert.



In standard form for the 360 tour to that point, U2 opened with "Breathe", a song from their new album which I am still warming up to. A good friend of mine drew attention to a different lyrical interpretation of the song, casting it in the light of establishing one's personal identity. I'm still considering this, although I can say that it's very much a beat-like poem set to music, like nothing else they've ever written. In my mind, it took them a few songs to really get reved up. Next on the setlist was "No Line on the Horizon", a somewhat more compelling song from the new album, performed in front of a stark screen of black and white. Instrumentally, this was a very tight performance of a song which harkens a bit more to the glory days of the Joshua Tree. Bono's introduction of the band was disarmingly humourous, with a low key charm which contrasted with the high, operatic drama of the Popmart tour or ZooTV. Bono called Adam a "sexual predator" and dropped references to the "space ship" they were performing in and claimed that they had "some new songs, some old songs, and some songs they could barely play". It was blatant false humility on the last claim.



Next up on the roster was "Get on Your Boots", which I frankly think is one of their most ridiculous songs to date. Time will not redeem this song. It is the "Some Days are better Than Others" of the new album, without the contrived seriousness. "Magnificent", on the other hand, is hands-down the best song of the new album, a glorious return to old form, and an Augustinian declaration of worship. Their performance was indeed flawlessly magnificent, and with Bono's arms outstretched and eyes closed, I felt he was leading the unknowing crowd in worship of the Magnificent. Next was a rendition of "Beautiful Day", a personal favourite.



However, the next song -- "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" -- is the point where I felt the band began to capture the crowd and show their true magic. Bono let the crowd sing the first verse, and his singing of the rest of song was sweetly soulful. It was undeniably magical. "Elevation" came next, and then the rare and strange song "My Blue Room", which I admit I was not familiar with. The video, though, was a strangely haunting one, linking the viewer to an astronaut on the International Space Station. If it were a lesser band, it may have been a momentum killer. "Unknown Caller" followed on its heels, with a karaoke like screen.



Next, they pulled out one of my all-time favourite songs: "Until the End of the World". A musically epic, and poetically brilliant song, it is an exploration of sin and redemption, ironically written to sound like the tale of the broken and remade hearts of lovers, but actually somewhat cryptically written (mostly) from the vantage point of Judas Iscariot during the events surrounding the crucifixion. The Edge's guitar work could not be better, and Bono delivered with passion and drama, running a lap around the massive stage before collapsing in a heap at the Edge's feet, with the spotlight on him. This was definitely one of the best performances of the night.

U2 followed it with a song which is best performed live - "Stay (Faraway, So Close)". It was simply electrifying in its soaring beauty. U2 also played a stirring, sing-a-long version of "Stand by Me". It was simply one of those perfect moments.

"The Unforgettable Fire", a way-back-playback from its eponymous album, surprised me by how much I enjoyed it, as it usually is not a song I'm partial to. And in the first track from "How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb", the pulled out "City of Blinding Lights", a song I was hoping they'd play. It was sweet to belt out the chorus to the band, "Oh, you look so beautiful tonight, in this city of blinding lights", underneath the lights of condos, Toronto's Bay Street Banking Core, and the CN tower. It seemed fitting.

Part 3 is yet to come...

The Concert Of a Lifetime -- Part 1

If you have been in any sort of contact with me in the past month, you will know that I had been looking forward with what could understatedly be called rabid enthusiasm to a concert on September 16. Those of you who have known me for a long time know that I am a massive fan of U2, and I secured tickets to their 360 tour on September 16, in the Skydome. I have been looking forward to blogging about this for some time, but I have been fairly busy. Prepare yourself to read about this concert in detail which will either be excruciatingly drawn out or deliciously detailed, depending on your point of view.



Simply put, seeing U2 live was something I wanted to do before I died. I'm almost ashamed to say how important this was for me... a dream for years.



I was delighted to hear that U2 was going to be playing in the Skydome (which sold out for a rock concert in only the second time in its history) and that, as the weather was good, they were going to be playing with the top open (also for only the second time in its history). After working at York that day (it was a delightful day) I scooted downtown on the reliable TTC, rendezvoused with my friend, and headed over to the 'Dome. My seats were not amazingly close, being seated in the 500 level, but they were directly across from the front of the stage, if you could call it that. True to its name, the 360 tour features a massive stage -- the biggest in rock history -- which features no bad views. The stage is quite literally monstrous, a colossal green and yellow set of tentacles which look like they were ripped out of a 1950s Japanese sci-fi.



Adding to the delight of the evening was the fact that so many of my friends were at the concert. After excitedly talking on the phone with as many of them as I could, we sat down and watched the opening band, Snow Patrol. I hadn't had a huge exposure to the band before the concert, although I tried to do my homework before the show, and my friend was fairly knowledgeable and had a good appreciation for them. The crowd was understandably smaller, but the boys from North Ireland (Dundee, Scotland? Glasgow?) did not disappoint. The band was tight, and the lead singer had a certain self-deprecating charm, tinged with awe-filled humility to be opening for the greatest rock act of our time. I can't quite find Snow Patrol's setlist, but they seemed to play a lot of stuff from their "Eyes Open" album. Their rendition of "Shut Your Eyes" in which they got the audience to sing along (I'm a sucker for band sing-a-longs) drew me in to the band's performance; it's just a hauntingly melodic, yet rocking song as it is. Not surprisingly, "Chasing Cars" was a run away success, performed flawlessly live, with the dramatic, throbbing crescendo of guitar and beautiful, passionate vocals which made it such a hit song. One of their last songs was "Open Your Eyes", a tune I was not that familiar with but which was my friend's favourite Snow Patrol song. It was a winner, combining rock-out rattle and hum with a flirtatious taste of what the 360 screen was capable of, flashing unrelentingly and rapidly between shots of the individual band members and a couple who made out for the camera with a love for exhibition. Snow Patrol gained my unqualified respect by the end of their set. Overall, the band was solid and Gary Lightbody was impressive as a humerous, Celtic frontman and as a passionate singer with a unique voice. As we went to get our Skydome burgers, I couldn't help but reflect, like a true English lit major, on the band's insistent imagery focused on eyes and hands, coupled with imperatives to the audience as the second person, combining for a sense of immediacy in the moment which lent themselves to a sort of intense, earnest passion.



And, as their set went on, the Toronto sky, framed behind the CN Tower and the newly mushrooming glass condos, shifted from daylight to a beautiful dusk. Night was approaching, and with it, U2. My excitement was rising, even as the temperature dropped to the point where it necessitated sweaters. I was stoked.



Part 2 is coming...

Weekend Pleasures.

Good conversation. The challenges of friends.

Meat.

The feel of working up a sweat moving boxes.

Meat again.

Finis.

Canterbury Tales

Continuing in my review of the 24 books I have planned to read in 2009, the second category I planned to read from was Medieval Literature. For this category, I read Chaucer's "Canterbury Tales".

First off, I would like to say that I eschewed reading them in their original Middle English, as in 2008 I took a graduate class where there was far too much reading in Middle English.

Chaucer seems to be almost universally lauded as a genius. It seems to me, though, that almost every particular type of critic and reader likes to imagine Chaucer as someone who is exactly like themselves. Secular humanists like to see him as a proto-humanist, with his religious tales being mainly satirical. The religious crowd likes to imagine Chaucer as being devout, although most would be happy to somehow bury the anti-semitism of the Prioress' tale. I prefer to leave Chaucer's slippery personality in the Canterbury Tales to be uninterpreted. It's more a mess of the diversity of points of view and experiences in human life, a mass of stories. It is a text easy to read from a post-modern perspective.

I must say that I much prefer "Troilus and Criseyde" or many other medieval romances to the individual Canterbury Tales, but that's just me. The potty humour is not generally enough to leave me entertained, nor do I have a great desire to use Chaucer to press my critical agenda (see above). Some tales have some good entertainment value (see the Knight's Tale or the Wife of Bath's Tale). Some, such as the disturbing Prioress' Tale, in which a kabal of Jews slaughters a young Christian boy, are interpretatively knotty, and can sustain lengthy analysis. Some are just downright boring. There. I said it.

The form itself is interesting, although the versification can make extended reading quite tiring. The very framed narrative structure, with the quarrelling, worldly characters taking turns telling their tales along the way to Canterbury is the most truly noteworthy and ingenious part of Chaucer's work, though. If you wish to get a taste for this work without reading the entirety of it, as I did, may I suggest you read the General Introduction and the Wife of Bath's Tale?

Where There's Smoke...

Today, as I was walking home from a refreshing time in the woods of a local ravine, I saw the flash of emergency lights. Coming closer, I realized there were not just a few emergency vehicles, but, indeed, the police had cordoned off the entire block where I lived. Police cars, paramedic vehicles, fire trucks. Especially fire trucks.

I asked some of the local firemen if my place was OK. After I told them where I lived, he said the people above me had had a fire and the firemen had to punch out the locks from my door to get in my apartment. I secretly thought that the second part was pretty cool.

I spent the next few hours leading firemen and electric inspectors through my apartment, taking care of my neighbours, and doing things that needed to happen like sorting things out with my landlord and getting new deadbolts put on the door. Fortunately, there was no water or smoke damage to my apartment, but the neighbours upstairs have an apartment that looks like a small bomb went off in it.

In other news, we found out that my landlord has not had functional smoke alarms or carbon monoxide detectors in our place, and, according to the fire department, that's a big deal. Charges shall be pressed. The worst part of it is my neighbours' two year old girl is still in the hospital being checked out.

I am thankful it happened in the day, though, as the firemen says that if it were night, they'd have to be carrying people out. I may try and sleep somewhere else tonight.

Upon Reading Fagles' Iliad

Last December, in a move which must have been subconsciously aimed at cementing "nerdy" status, I made a list of 24 categories from which I wanted to read one book each in 2009. I'm sure there will be a post on "Stuff White People Like" on something like this sometime soon. So far, I'm pretty close to being on pace.

One of the categories which I put down I wanted to read a book out of was "Ancient and Classical Literature". So, since I had never actually read the "Iliad" and I was going on a long trip to North Africa, I decided to pick up a translation -- Robert Fagles'.

It's a long book.

My non-professional thoughts?

I honestly preferred the "Odyssey" to the "Iliad", but there is much to be said about the "Iliad". The long-churning battle scenes, with extended, gory descriptions of death -- "Person X hacked Person Y with Weapon Z and Body Organ Q was visible" -- almost seemed to produce an imitation of the battle weariness of the Greeks and Trojans after nine years of combat in the reader himself. I could not bring myself to enjoy the extended battle in a straightforward way after the eleventh such 20 page battle, so I'll chalk Homer's technique up to some sort of mimesis. This view could be supported by Homer's tendency to describe the life of a promising young youth -- his parentage and upbringing -- only to have him die savagely at the hand of Hector or Achilles, a seeming nod to the wastefulness of war. I say this even though I am not a strict pacifist myself.

Likewise, although I expected myself to be rooting for the Greeks the entire time, Homer seemed to make it impossible to side entirely with the Greeks or the Trojans.

Surprisingly, my favourite character in the "Iliad" would have to be Hector. The image of a man who is chiefly dedicated to caring for his family, yet is willing to face his duty in war courageously and with deadly capability is very appealing to the Renaissance Man in me. Most noteworthy in the "Iliad", to me, is the scene in which he tenderly bids his wife goodbye before he faces the battlefield, and when his toddler son sees him in his horsehair helmet, his son cries, scared of his father. The couple laugh at the son, and Hector takes his son in his arms and prays that the son might grow to be a better man than the father. That is better than a rom-com for men. It is little wonder that the Medieval Europeans counted him as one of the four Pagan Worthy Knights

Out of all the Greeks, Odysseus, the crafty and diplomatic one, seems to be the most likeable. Compare his tact and wisdom against the infantile power-plays of Agamemnon and the selfish, childish sulking of Achilles, and he stacks up quite well.

A good friend of mine considers Achilles to be his favourite character in the book, but I would dissent. Achilles is undoubtably unmatched on the field of conflict, almost godlike in his powers. But Hector's strength is a well-tempered strength; his character is well-rounded. And until the Styx-dipped Achilles shows up, Hector is well-nigh unstoppable. His death, like an animal put to flight around the walls of Troy, was, to say the obvious, lamentable.

The translation itself, by Robert Fagles, leaves me nothing to complain about. It is terse and highly readable.

Refreshment

I have a mixed relationship with summer. Don't get me wrong, I love the season itself. The lush green of verdant forests, running in the muggy heat until the sweat pours down your skin and you plunge into a cold lake, and the magic of late summer evenings are all things that I enjoy. The world is alive in summer. Heck, I even like the idea of summer, as Northrop Frye expresses it. Summer, Frye suggests, is the representation of Romance, the perfect world, Heaven. The typology is there.

The reality of summer doesn't alway measure up, though. For me, growing up, summer was when the students left my college town, making it feel empty. I remember summers working questionably legal jobs in Owen Sound, like moving bricks up uneven scaffolding without safety equipment (I never was paid for that). Summers could be great, but sometimes they could be slow, in all the bad senses of the word.

This summer has been refreshing in so many ways. Along with all the physical refreshments of summer, which I first alluded to, this summer has had deeper, more subtle, but more exquisite pleasures of refreshment, suggesting a shadow of Frye's Summer. Reunification with people you have not seen in years, with all the laughter that brings. Meeting new people who may become old friends. The delicious ache which comes through getting back into running. The soul-restoring quiet of a cottage from childhood memory, reading books which restore my spirit. Words of Truth at Grace Toronto. Remembering things which were forgotten. Becoming re-newed.

Sometimes, "thank you" doesn't seem enough.

Overcoming Blog-guilt

I think a lot more people would start blogs if they didn't dread the prospect of feeling guilty for when they don't update. I, currently, while not feeling guilty, per se, am feeling like a very bad blogger. Which in turn makes me delay updating my blog. Which in turn makes me feel bad. It kind of reminds me of checking in on that person you have not talked to in ages, but were supposed to. Or unclogging the bathroom drain. Tasks you delay become more painful. Not that this is a task.

How do you sum up the past few months? I was best man for my buddy, started a new job, went to North Africa, saw people come into my life and leave, some of them significantly. Looking back on my old blog postings, it's fascinating to see how I (and we all) evolve as a person. How the things we think about, the things that bother us and worry us, the view from here all change.

I will resist the urge to quote Heraclitus here.

My old blog posts look like the rings of an old tree, or the layers of sedimentation, where I can read the past from the eye of the past me, not from the renewed lens of the present. I sometimes wonder how my future eyes will read this present.

After arriving home from North Africa, I am more excited for what life holds. I love the sensation of catching a whiff of a scent you have not smelled in a while, the pungent odour of adventure. It is a pleasure, more than any other, to know, more than I did yesterday, the God who has created me to know and follow Him.